A few days ago we had the chance to meet with the head pastor Richie Shaw from Real Life Ministries (the church we are thinking about attending here in Spokane). It was just a real casual meeting but we just both kind of shared our stories, learned what the church is about and where they are headed and were able to ask any questions we wanted.
One of the things Richie asked us was what our journey has been like through Parker's diagnosis. Usually as soon as someone asks me, I get very emotional and have a hard time formulating my words because I am too busy trying to keep myself composed. Yesterday I started to get emotional but asked The Lord to give me strength to really share-and he did just that :) Nick did most of the talking, but I was able to clearly put into words some of my experience and it felt great to be able to share.
After we finished telling our story Richie shared some powerful words with us that kind of helped me have an "A-Ha" moment with this journey. We have never doubted that we are some of the most blessed people around. Despite his challenges, Parker brings so much joy to our lives and is so special that I cannot imagine a single second without him. His placement in our family is nothing short of a divine miracle and we are so blessed by him.
But what really spoke to me was when Richie said that a lot of people would be jealous or envious of us.
I have never thought that someone would be jealous or envious of our experience. This experience has been the hardest thing we have ever had to endure and not a day goes by that we arent faced with heartache and desperation as we are still navigating this special needs life.
He continued on with stating that a lot of Christians and people in general spend their whole lives LONGING and YEARNING for that deep intimacy with God. They search and try to find that deep connection with Jesus.
But God has chosen us to have that glimpse. We are the lucky ones that God has opened up a little more of himself to. We have seen a more intimate side of Him that only comes out of complete and total desperation. We have seen the body of Christ come together to lift up our family. We have gotten a chance to really connect with Jesus on a level that most people spend their lives searching for.
I spent a lot of last night mulling over this and felt so humbled and blessed that God would choose US to reveal that side of Him to. We are so unworthy to have that deep relationship with Him, but through our amazing son Parker, He has given us that opportunity.
I know we have plenty of learning, growing, and desperation that will happen in the future, but being able to get a glimpse of God's plan through this situation has been nothing short of amazing.
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